Does Red Bull give you wings? If not, you have the right to sue them, although someone already did that and won a big payout for Red Bull consumers. It was just one of the millions of lawsuits that come to courts that are more hilarious than disturbing. Courts are one of the most important things in any civilised country, but their ability to deliver true justice is tempted, sometimes to extreme limits. From lawsuits against the almighty to a criminal who sued himself for his crimes and requested the government to pay the fine against him to himself, you won’t believe the trouble a professional sanctions law firm has to deal with. Here is a look at the 10 most hilarious court cases ever filed.
The Guy That Sued God For Letting Him Go Into “Sin”
If you are a baptized Christian, then it means you have an agreement with God to protect you from evil and, of course, not lead you into sin as Our Lord’s Prayer says. Pavel Mircea was sentenced to 20 Years in prison for murder and felt that the Romanian justice system was unfair.
He filed an appeal in court claiming that the devil led him to commit the murder and that God represented by the Romanian Orthodox church, should take the blame too. He claimed that when he was baptized, he had an agreement with God that he wouldn’t let the devil mislead him. However, the court dismissed the case because God could not be brought to court as he didn’t have a physical address.
The Criminal that sued Himself for $5M
What happens when your complaints against the US prison system keep backfiring on you? Turns, you can still sue yourself in some frivolous lawsuit. In 1995, Robert Brock, who was serving a sentence in Indiana for breaking and entering, filed a case in front of a judge suing himself for breaking his personal moral code.
He said he violated his religious beliefs and abused his rights by using drugs and getting into criminal activity, which led him to commit the crimes that put him in prison. However, since he was a ward of the state at the time and not earning any income, he could not pay the $5 million fine he was suing himself for, and so the state should pay it for him. The judge dismissed the case as frivolous but said it was a very creative approach to the law.
The Woman Who Sued McDonald’s For Serving “Too Hot Coffee”
A hot cup of coffee I what everyone seeks at a McDonald’s drive-thru, so you wouldn’t expect someone to complain when they get one. However, in 1994, Stella Liebeck, who was 79 at the time, ordered a coffee at a drive-thru and burnt six percent of her skin when she held it between her laps in the car. She called McDonald’s to pay her medical bills while in hospital, and the chain offered her $800, but she wanted $125,000, so she went to court.
The case attracted other complainants and soon turned into a class-action lawsuit that saw McDonald’s required to pay $2.86 million. It was later reduced to $480 thousand as the appeals court agreed that Stella was partially responsible for the accident. The ridiculous payout was later labelled the Stella Award.
The Customer That Sued Red Bull For “Not Giving Him Wings”
“Red Bull gives you wings” is one of the most popular ads globally, which has earned the drinks company a big fortune. However, in 2016, a consumer went to court suing the company for making false claims about the drink and making misleading ads because Red Bull doesn’t give you wings even in the imaginative sense of the term.
The judge agreed that drinking Red Bull didn’t energize someone nor improve their focus, meaning the plaintiffs were right in their claims, and Red Bull was going to lose the case when they agreed to settle out of court. The agreed to pay over $600,000 in the form of products given to consumers for free. However, the website for claiming the free Red Bull crashed a few minutes after being opened as too many people came in to claim a free drink. Maybe it gives wings after all!
The Bugler That Got Electrocuted, And The Family Sued The Store Owner
When you own a bar and set up traps to catch trespassers, but they end up dying instead, should you be blamed for the death? On August 3, 1997, Larry Harris, was trying to break into a tavern in Aurora, Illinois, when he got killed by a 220V wire the owner used to rig the window to deter burglars after being robbed three times.
Harris family then sued the owner for using the high-voltage wire, claiming he valued his property more than human life and was solely responsible for the death. The jury agreed that the force used to protect the property was extreme and lethal, and hence the property owner was half-way liable for the death and hence had to pay the family $75,000. The total amount granted by the jury to the family was $150,000, but the dead burglar was required to pay half of the amount.
The Judge That Sued A Drycleaner for $67 Million for Lost Pants
Roy L. Pearson made headlines in the US in 2016 when he sued the Chung Drycleaners for $67 million for allegedly losing his pair of pants. The judge claimed that the business had broken its own promise of “Satisfaction Guaranteed” printed on a sign at the door. He also said that the shop had caused him mental anguish, pain, and stress when they failed to deliver his pair of pants within a day as they had promised. He later reduced the amount claimed to $54 million amid an outcry against him for misusing his knowledge of the law. The judge later dismissed the case and had the judge suspended for two years for filing frivolous litigations and judicial misconduct.
Suing Nike For Not Labelling Their Shoes As “Dangerous Weapons”
Sirgiorgio Clardy was a Pimp in Portland in 2012 when he encountered one man that tried to leave the hotel without paying his prostitute. He stomped on the man’s head until his face was deformed, and he needed plastic surgery to repair it. He also beat the woman that didn’t get paid until she bled from her ears.
In their verdict, the jury decided that Clardy was responsible for battery and causing bodily harm using “a dangerous weapon,” which in this case was the pair of Nike’s Air Jordans that he was wearing at the time. Clardy then sued Nike for not labelling their product appropriately and not warning him that the shoes could also be used as a deadly and dangerous weapon. Nike replied to the suit saying that their product couldn’t cause any harm if used properly as intended, a reply the judge agreed to and sent Clardy away to serve his long sentence.
The Guy That Sued Requesting To Legally Change His Birthday
Age is one of those things you can’t change about yourself, but as you grow older, you may lose advantages of certain age groups, which this man in the Netherlands thought was unfair. Emile Ratelband was born on March 11, 1949, so he was 69 in 2018 when he filed a lawsuit requesting to move his birthday to March 1969 hence legally erasing 20 years off his age.
He claimed that being 69 meant he couldn’t apply for jobs, buy a new house and get his dream car and that his Tinder profile also didn’t get any clicks because of his age. He argued that in an age where someone can change their gender, skin colour, and name, people should be allowed to change their age if they feel their lives would be better that way. He said that if the court allowed him to change his age, he would denounce his pension. The court, however, disagreed and dismissed the case.
Subway Sued Because The Sandwich Is Not A Foot Long
Subway has over 44,000 outlets worldwide, and their Footlong Sandwich is one of the franchise’s most famous products. However, in 2013, a boy posted a photo that proved that the Footlong sandwich was actually an inch short, meaning the company was trading on a lie. The Class Action started a few years later as a group of lawyers and 10 plaintiffs took Subway to the court requesting compensation for being served sub-standard sandwiches.
The Plaintiffs won the case and were due for $5000 in incentives and that Subway would pay the $520,000 legal fee owed to the plaintiffs` lawyers. Subway appealed and won the case as the judge said the case was too weak and that the Class action case that only benefited the lawyers and not the customers of Subway was not valid. Subway later said that it was impossible to maintain minor length details while baking but that the quantity and quality of food in their sandwiches is not compromised.
The Guy That Sued His Wife For Giving Birth To An Ugly Baby
At first, suing your wife because your new-born baby is not as beautiful as the two of you may sound unfair and stupid, but this Chinese man was totally justified. Jian Feng went to court immediately after receiving a baby girl, their firstborn with his beautiful wife. He claimed that the baby was very ugly and couldn’t have been the product of him and his flawlessly beautiful wife.
He accused his wife of cheating, but the DNA confirmed that the daughter was his, leading to the pressure that forced his wife to confess that she had a $100,000 before their marriage. Since she hadn’t told her husband about the surgery, the judge agreed that she had married him under false premises, and hence the marriage wasn’t valid. She was told to pay the poor man $120,000 for causing him emotional harm.