My dog is a very grumpy dog. When it rains he is grumpy, when it is hot, he is grumpy and when I stop playing ball with him he once again gets grumpy. Much like the grumpy cat, I think most animals have a good life and don’t really have a lot to be grumpy about. But that doesn’t seem to stop this lot…
BONUS CONTENT: Top 10 Funniest Limericks
10 – “Yes I am wearing lipstick, do you have a problem with that?!?”
If you’re lacking a little good cheer,
Go and tickle a bull in the rear,
For I’m sure that the rumour
That they’ve no sense of humour
Is a product of ignorant fear.
9 – “I hate going to the library, every book I look at I have reedit”
There was a bold pirate of Boulder
Whose cutlass was slung from his shoulder
He’d mighty fine notions
Of plundering oceans,
But his mum said: “Perhaps when you’re older.”
8 – “You want to attach what to my udders? That is just lazy and I refuse to take part.”
A circus performer named Brian
Once smiled as he rode on a lion.
They came back from the ride,
But with Brian inside,
And the smile on the face of the lion.
7 – “Do I look like I know where Nemo is?!?”
There was an old man of Dumbree,
Who taught little owls to drink tea;
For he said, To eat mice,
Is not proper or nice
That amiable man of Dumbree.
6 – “This bread you put out is well past it’s sold by date, I demand to speak to the chef!”
An intrepid explorer named Petty
Intended to capture a yeti,
But the yeti yelled, “Freeze!
I’ve a gun—on your knees,
While my Dad gets the ring and confetti.”
5 – “I was not chatting up the hairbrush! ..it came on to me, I wasn’t even interested!”
There was once a young girl who said: “Why Can’t I look in my ear with my eye?
If I put my mind to it
I’m sure I can do it.
You never can tell till you try.”
4 – “You know that branding stick it going to end up where the sun does shine!”
A funny young fellow named Perkins
Was terribly fond of small gherkins.
One day after tea
He ate ninety-three
And pickled his internal workings.
3 – “Call me slippers again I will show you why I was once called Thumper!”
There was a young schoolboy of Rye,
Who was baked by mistake in a pie.
To his mother’s disgust
He emerged through the crust,
And exclaimed, with a yawn, “Where am I?”
2 – “You threw the stupid stick, you ‘FETCH’ it!”
An ambitious young fellow named Matt
Tried to parachute using his hat.
Folks below looked so small
As he started to fall,
Then got bigger and bigger and SPLAT!
1 – “Who invented Mondays!?! Whoever it was is stupid.”
There was a young lady from Leeds
Who swallowed a package of seeds.
Now this sorry young lass
Is quite covered in grass,
But has all the tomatoes she needs.