1. The Way They Make Eye Contact
Casual conversations usually come with quick, polite eye contact. Flirting often comes with a look that lingers, a little sparkle, or frequent glances back to you across the room. If they hold your gaze a fraction longer than necessary, it may be more than manners.
Example: You order a latte, look up, and the barista keeps your gaze a beat longer with a smile. That extra moment can be telling.
2. Their Body Language Gives It Away
Open posture, leaning in, mirroring your movements, tilting the head while you speak, or angling their feet towards you can all be signs of interest. Neutral body language is more likely with simple friendliness.
For a deeper dive into nonverbal cues, the British Psychological Society regularly highlights research on body language and social behaviour.
3. They Find Excuses to Be Near You
People who are flirting look for natural reasons to cross paths. They may time their lunch when you do, hop into your conversation, or choose a seat close by. Friends enjoy your company too, but flirters tend to engineer proximity more often.
4. Compliments That Go Beyond the Usual
There is a difference between a quick compliment and one that feels personal. Compare a simple “Nice shirt” with “That colour really brings out your eyes.” The second one focuses on you, not just the outfit.
5. They Remember the Little Details
Friendly people can be thoughtful, but consistent recall of your favourite coffee order, your dog’s name, or that TV show you mentioned last week is a strong indicator of focused interest.
6. Playful Teasing and Banter
Gentle teasing can be part of a flirty rhythm. The key is tone and balance. It should feel light, respectful, and reciprocal. If it ever feels uncomfortable, it is perfectly fine to say so and set a boundary.
7. Their Messages Have a Flirty Tone
Late-night chats, winking emojis, playful compliments, and conversations that stretch on are common signs. If they open the door for longer exchanges and keep stepping through it, you may have more than friendly messaging on your hands.
8. You Get Their Full Attention
When someone is genuinely interested, they tend to put the phone down, ask follow-up questions, and remember your answers. Friends can be attentive too, but flirters focus intently and make you feel like the main event.
9. Their Friends Act a Bit Different Around You
Watch the friend group. Teasing, knowing looks, or strategic exits that leave you two alone are classic clues. If their mates seem to be nudging things along, there is a good chance your admirer has been talking about you.
10. They Look for Respectful Opportunities to Touch
Light, appropriate touches like a quick shoulder pat, a playful nudge, or brushing hands can signal attraction. Consent and comfort come first. If you are ever unsure about boundaries, remember that clear communication is essential and that consent must be freely given and ongoing. The NHS overview of consent is a helpful resource.
Friendly or Flirty? How to Tell
No single sign proves flirting. Look for clusters of cues that repeat over time. If several of the signs above show up consistently and you feel comfortable, they are probably trying to signal interest. If things feel mixed, a simple, kind question like “Are you flirting with me, or am I reading this wrong?” can clear the air without drama.
Handy Next Steps
- Want to brush up on your own playful patter? Try our light-hearted list of funny pick-up lines.
- Thinking of taking the hint and planning a meet-up? Check out these first date ideas that are low-pressure and fun.